**The *Real* College Rankings: Schools That Actually Teach You to Survive in This Crappy Economy** 🎓💸🔧

-

Forget the fancy **U.S. News College Rankings**! Who cares about prestige when you’re drowning in student debt and can't even change your own oil? 😤🚗 It’s time to rank colleges by what actually *matters*—teaching you how to survive in this **crappy economy**. 💸🏚️


Here’s a ranking system we can get behind: schools that give you the tools to **budget your money**, **fix your own car**, and **upkeep a house**—you know, *real* life skills that don’t involve writing 10-page essays on ancient philosophy. 📝🙄


### The *Real* Top 5 College Skills We Need


1. **Survival 101: Budgeting Your Money** 🤑📉  

Why aren’t schools teaching how to balance a budget or, I don’t know, *avoid bankruptcy* when inflation is out of control? 💸 College should prepare you for the reality of rent, bills, and trying to stretch that paycheck to the end of the month. 🏠💡


2. **Auto Repair: Because Mechanics Are Expensive** 🔧🚗  

Who needs a liberal arts degree when your car breaks down and you can’t afford a mechanic? 💀 Knowing how to change your oil, fix a flat tire, and *maybe* avoid getting ripped off at the shop is a *real* life skill. Mechanics won’t take your English degree as payment! 😏💵


3. **Home Maintenance: Be Your Own Landlord** 🏚️🔨  

You know what’s useful? Knowing how to fix a leaky faucet or repair drywall without spending a fortune. 💧🔧 Forget about analyzing poetry—give us a crash course in *home upkeep* so we can stop paying $200 for a plumber to unclog the toilet. 🚽🙄


4. **Job Hunting in a Dystopian Economy** 💼🌪️  

Welcome to the *real world*, where a diploma doesn’t guarantee a job and most offers come with low pay and zero benefits. 🥲 Colleges should be teaching us how to **network**, **freelance**, and **start side hustles** just to stay afloat. 💻💡


5. **Tax Prep 101: Avoid the IRS** 📝💸  

Why are we learning calculus but not how to do our own taxes? 🧐 We need classes on understanding deductions, avoiding audits, and not getting crushed by the IRS every April. 📅💰


### Time to Change the Rankings!

Let’s be honest: in today’s economy, knowing how to fix a car or stretch a dollar is worth way more than a degree from a top 10 school that leaves you clueless about the *real world*. 🎓💀 Colleges that *actually* prepare you to deal with life’s daily headaches should be at the top of the rankings. 🏆


#RealLifeSkills 🎓 #CollegeRankings 🙄 #FixYourCar 🔧 #BudgetYourMoney 💸 #SurvivalSkills 🏠 #ForgetTheFancySchools 😏 #LifePrep 💼 #Adulting101 🔨 #LearnToSurvive 📉 #CrappyEconomy 🤯


via GIPHY

Comments

Post a Comment

Ebay

Ebay
Ebay Has Cosplays

Popular posts from this blog

🌃✨ **Rediscover the Thrills of "Nighthawks" (1981) with Coconutdaddy!** ✨🌃

-
Image
Hello, cinema lovers and action aficionados! 🍿🎬 Are you ready to dive into the gritty, pulse-pounding world of 80s crime thrillers? Coconutdaddy is back with an exhilarating review and reaction to the iconic film **"Nighthawks" (1981)**! Starring the legendary Sylvester Stallone and the brilliant Rutger Hauer, this film is a must-watch for anyone who loves high-stakes drama and intense action. 💥🔍 **"Nighthawks"** takes us on a wild ride through New York City, as two tough cops take on an international terrorist. Directed by Bruce Malmuth, this film captures the essence of 80s thrillers with its raw energy and gripping storyline. Join Coconutdaddy as he breaks down the film’s standout moments, performances, and the elements that make it a timeless classic. 🌆🚨 via GIPHY **Why should you watch this review? Here’s why:** 1. **In-Depth Commentary**: Coconutdaddy provides insightful analysis and engaging commentary, delving into the film’s plot, characters, an
Read more

🎬 **Coconutdaddy’s Take: "Thou Shalt Not Kill... Except" (1985) - The Almost Raimi & Campbell Show!** 🎬

-
Image
Alright, folks, buckle up because we're diving into a hidden gem of the 80s action-horror scene, "Thou Shalt Not Kill... Except," also known as "Stryker's War." This 1985 cult classic is the closest thing we’ll get to seeing Sam Raimi strut his stuff as an actor and maybe, just maybe, catch a whiff of Bruce Campbell’s directing chops. 🍿 **A Little Background for Ya!** Directed by Josh Becker, this film stars Robert Rickman, John Manfredi, Tim Quill, Cheryl Hausen, Perry Mallette, and yes, our favorite, Sam Raimi. 📽️ Written by Becker and Scott Spiegel, the story was conjured up by Becker, the legendary Bruce Campbell, and Sheldon Lettich. Talk about a powerhouse team! 💥 **What's the Deal with the Cast?** Well, let’s just say this isn’t your typical Hollywood lineup. Most of the roles are filled by Becker’s friends and family, with some familiar faces for those who’ve kept up with Renaissance Pictures flicks. 🌟 The film premiered in Warren, Michigan,
Read more

**Ten of the Weirdest Movies about Ten of the Weirdest Fetishes: A Humorous Critic's Journey into the Uncharted Territories of Cinema**

-
Image
Greetings, cinephiles and curious minds! Strap in, because today we’re taking a plunge into the cinematic abyss where the unusual becomes the norm and the weirdness knows no bounds. From the depths of the internet’s most peculiar corners, I present to you ten of the weirdest movies about ten of the weirdest fetishes. Be prepared for a ride that’s as unsettling as it is side-splittingly hilarious. Grab your popcorn, but maybe skip the extra butter for this one. 1. **“Crash” (1996) – Symphorophilia**        David Cronenberg, the maestro of body horror, takes us on a wild ride with "Crash." This movie delves into symphorophilia, where car crashes become the ultimate aphrodisiac. Watching people get all hot and bothered over fender benders is something you can't unsee. Who knew a pile-up on the freeway could be the backdrop for a steamy rendezvous? 2. **“The Night of the Hunter” (1955) – Hands Fetish**        Move over, Shakespeare; Robert Mitchum's hands are here t
Read more